This is where players write about themselves, not where admins post. I don't want to post this in the Admin Introductions because I already have a legitimate post there for an admin to explain themselves. So why am I posting here? Frankly, I don't know. I know why I am posting, but I don't know where to put it... and that is my responsibility as a Forum Moderator. My reason for posting this is because I am deciding my future with TF2SwapShop. I want all to see it and have the ability to read it rather than just admins. So let me begin.
Hello reader, my name is Sean but most call me Sixteen. I have been an admin at TF2SwapShop for about 2 years. I have been Server Admin, demoted, then Server Admin again, and finally Forum Moderator. From my time at SwapShop, I have met many people, most of which I can say I like a lot while also having a few that didn't rub so well with me. Of course, this is to be expected anywhere throughout life. SwapShop is fantastic and very enjoyable.
But with every good, there is a bad. As time continued throughout my time here, I have lost motivation, excitement, and desire to be here. When the new Forums began, I was so determined to help Death in any way I could. Now, I have many ideas to make the servers better for all that have been running throughout my head for last few weeks, but I have pushed off making a post over and over again. If I was the admin I once was, that post would have been on the forums day one when the thought came into my noggin. Now, I ignore report bot and do what I want rather than doing the better for the community. I remember my beginning weeks after becoming an admin again and just seeing all of the admins online but having no one respond to them. I would respond sarcastically saying "Oh? No one else wants it? I guess I will take it... again..." Of course, this was back when we had half the staff we have now, but I still could not understand the lack of commitment from the admins of the time. They had all said that they were busy or it was dumb, but back then I felt that all reports were important. Sadly, I have become that. I do not take reports eagerly; if it came to someone asking why I didn't take reports, I would say that I am busy, even if I was playing Terraria or The Binding Of Isaac. Now I watch all of the new admins scramble around for taking reports like they are Easter Eggs. They speak in report bot and talk to each other having fun and enjoying themselves while I just sit waiting for them to stop sending beeps and boops. I used to make lists of the good things and bad things of players that we were reviewing for administration. Now, I say yes or no, if that. People say things and I just shoot them down. I fight the other side of ideas which very well can be good, but I do it for everything which is not good. Earlier there was a conflict on report bot where someone disagreed with something that was going on and I almost explained the other side and why their point was irrelevant, even though I fully agreed with them. I used to create great times for the players showing them "Look at what I can do, let's all be HHH and have a death match!" and everyone goes "WOW that's awesome, I love this server. do it again!" and now I just sit there doing the same rocket jumps I have been doing since day one. I used to create players' desires to return to SwapShop but now I just make them want to leave (Look at the staff report about me).
I don't know what else to say. This is just a post to notify any and all readers of what is going through my head. I might stay, I might leave. I know some would rather me stay and others would rather me leave, but I cannot yet make any commitments to either side.
Life is like a coin where in any situation, there will be two sides. But that doesn't stop it from not making any cents.
~16
